Mr Starmer’s latest pontification on the use of CPOs to ease the housing crisis (he’s on a hat trick after the Green Belt last week) reminded me of Robin Hood – take from the rich and give to the poor.
In effect that’s what compulsory purchase is all about. Taking from stereotypically rich Tory-voting farmers (boo hiss) and giving to local authorities to build houses while paying the landowners diddly squat (sorry Jeremy).
With Sir Keir taking the role of Robin I got to thinking about the other players for the next Christmas panto.
A shoo-in for Maid Marian – with her flaming locks and come-hither eyes – is Angela Rayner.
I thought of Rishi as the evil Sheriff of Nottingham but he’s far too nice so instead we’ll have Michael Gove working from his fortress in Marsham Street and threatening to put the Merrie Men in Special Measures.
Among the Merrie Men we also had Will Scarlett who was a fearsome swordsman. Of course Boris is an obvious choice for this but he is on the naughty step. Shame as he was also a cert for Friar Tuck.
So, step forward Penny Mordaunt who kept the sword of state erect for two hours during the coronation.
Now we come to Alan-a-Dale, a troubadour and a fiddler. Among the ranks of our MPs we are spoilt for choice – fiddling is rife. First thoughts went to Alastair Campbell who can tell a great tale and ‘sex up’ proceedings.
But Alan came from a lowly family so the job goes to Wes Streeting who can really spin a good yarn (superb on TV) – a Cambridge man (oooooh) – but his grandad was an armed robber who knew the Krays and his granny did time in Holloway with Christine Keeler (ask your dad). Such credentials. Boy’s done well.
I hope you enjoy the pantomime and, if you don’t, tune into the BBC Parliament channel for the real thing.
Have a good weekend.
Tom
by the Planning PR guru 